Coming to the End

Since the Writing With Nancy show closed I’ve had a chance to sleep a lot these past two weeks. Once the set strike was complete, at like 8pm Sunday night) I got violently, wretchedly sick for a few days. A total purge. In that initial 72 hours it felt the way coming off a long road trip continues after the car has come to a standstill. I was heaving and dreaming, curled in a ball having acid flashbacks of the songs, monologues and moments of getting particular laughs etc. only to go deeply unconscious again. People have since mentioned that a stomach flu was going around; although I have not been sick like that in years. I think purging was part of completing this project, this period of my life, this stressful attempt to articulate and share my personal vision to date and TO GET IT OUT OF ME. There’s a reason people don’t act on their dreams. You make mistakes, you get a huge feedback buzz, (which includes disappointments & surprises–eek!) and to top it off you have explosive diarrhea while puking your guts out

Soon I was back up on emails and able to go to yoga and the gym. Then I fell into watching a little BBC television I’d missed. (Specifically, may I recommend the latest effort by Jennifer Saunders –of Ab Fab?– who has a new series titled, *Clatterford* that features an ensemble of 8 superb actors mostly in their 50s. Not to mention the special features commentary with Pedro Almodovar on his last film *Volver* talking with Penelope Cruz.) After a few days of that I called my friends and even had lunch one day with my bff, Denise just to feel slightly human again. Then I wrote a few more checks to pay for the show’s final production costs–including an HD video document of the performance, which I will be able to show to those out-of-towners who had wanted to see the show but couldn’t travel.

The question I have is: What is it like when you to complete something? You hear a lot of people talking about their plans or goals. Sometimes you hear people describing their creative process or even their latest accomplishments–like writing a contract on a piece of business. But it is rare in my experience to hear anybody talk about completion. Is it like death I wonder? In my case it is a multi-dimensional feeling of things coming OUT or being left behind. Got anything on that?

I can’t say I was all that motivated to celebrate the holiday this year although I have been drinking a cheap champagne from New Mexico called Gruet that’s awfully good.

Merry/Happy To All!

Comments

[Mick]

Hmmmm -- my perspective is definitely steeped in USA culture on this one -- when I complete something I am already in the phase of asking "What's next?" It's an uneasy melange I suspect of an irrepressible thirst for achievement and newness or attention deficit disorder. We don't like to look back much or wax nostalgic in this country, and in a capitalist / high achiever culture and economy we seem to think satisfaction with any status or accomplishment is the road to, nay, the joined-at-the-hip brother of complacency. I'm saying "we" inappropriately, but I suspect a lot of people know of what I am speaking....Cheers, Mick